Depression Medication: My Story So Far

My First Antidepressant

The first medication that was prescribed for me took the edge off the anxiety, but not much else. It helped me stop crying everyday.

I experienced side effects such as migraine headaches, constipation, dry mouth, and remained confused and unclear in my thinking.

After almost two months of not much progress, Karen took me back to the doctor and told him that it wasn't working and we needed another option. My doctor referred me to a psychiatrist, Dr. Robert Lockhart, who immediately set to work making changes.

Second and Third Together

On Wednesday (four days later) I returned to his office and when he learned how sleepy that antidepressant was making me he prescribed a second to counteract that side effect.

Two days later on Friday, Karen and I left for a two-week vacation in the sunny south.

Two days later yet, after Sunday morning church, we found ourselves with four other couples for a lovely brunch at a golf course. That was the first time in almost 3 months that I felt free to talk and interact with other people.

That change came about in eight days from the time I switched antidepressants. (That was also the day I first used my conversation stopper: "When I was visiting my psychiatrist…" in conversation and watched as everyone turned in my direction! My sense of humour was returning.)

For the next four months I continued with my daily routine. I watched what I was eating, drove the kids to school each day, went to the gym for a workout, and hid in public view. I liked having people around, as long as I didn't know any of them and have to talk.

I went to the counselor each week and to the Psychiatrist every two to three weeks. I had pledged to myself that I be as candid as possible, even though much of the time I felt shame for being such a whiner. It was not easy to give my irrational fears and anxieties over to men that I respected so much. But it is the path to wellness and I was desperate to get there.

Each visit to the Psychiatrist resulted in an increase in the dosage that I was taking. Each increase brought a further measure of mental and emotional relief.

If there is a negative side to the antidepressants used today, it is that they bring about a host of uncomfortable side effects. The side effects of these medications vary from person to person, and with an increasing dose the side effects are intensified.

All of these and more are worth persevering through if your husband is making progress in his journey away from the black hole of depression.

Nevertheless, after seven months I found relief for some of these side effects when I began to add to my wellness routine with food-based supplements.

Within seven months of the onset of my depression I had reached the highest recommended dosage for both antidepresants. I stayed there for the rest of that year.

In the second year of my recovery the doctor began to slowly reduce the amount of the two medication’s that I had been taking. Just before the completion of this page, after reaching the lowest possible dose and remaining there for many months, I stopped taking both medicines on the same day.

For the next several weeks I suffered the side effects of withdrawing from the pharmaceuticals. I was dizzy much of the day and was re-visited by headaches that I had not experienced for a number of months.

On the positive side, some of the annoying side effects of taking the medications stopped altogether. Most notable: no more constipation! It was a victory worth celebrating after two and a half years of struggle.

Antidepressant #4

Within a week one of my daughters said “Dad, why haven’t you been taking that one for the past year?!”

That is the medication side of my journey to date in an abbreviated form. It is highly unlikely that your husband will go through the same process, with the same medications, in the same time frame.

I tell you my story so that you won’t fear these medications if they are prescribed for your husband, but embrace them as part of your strategy to save your husband.

Lessons I learned about depression medication